Walk The Talk

It is not my intention to bring up an old issue.

I like the saying let sleeping dogs lie, but I need to reiterate something.

You keep saying I cannot handle it.

You like to imply that I cannot handle it.

Maybe its true, but we will never know.

But I know what am I handling badly.

Standing at the platform, not knowing am I jumping off.

I am reacting badly to the fact that I keep coming back to the platform and not knowing am I jumping off.

You told me once that I don’t need to stand at the edge until you know if you want me to jump.

But you keep sending me there and I keep standing at the edge.

And when I get chest pains, you say I cant handle the jump.

Its not the jump dear, it’s the anticipation of the jump, and the worse pains are when I have no idea am I going to jump.

You jump, I jump.

You say the jump is the same for the both of us.

I shouldn’t be so anal about it.

My dear, dear baby……

Its not the same, and it will never be the same.

You too have pains before , during and after the jump, but you enjoyed the jump.

You love the anticipation of the jump.

You love being involved in the jump.

You love talking about the jumps.

My dearest sayang…….

I only get chest pains…… there is no pleasure in it for me.

So, please excuse me if I am being anal about it.

You jump, I jump, because I love you.

I love seeing that smile on your face.

The smile that lights up your face like a beacon in the night.

Now you have said that I don’t have to jump at all, and I will not have to stand at the platform at all.

I hope you meant what you said.

I do love you, but another trip to the platform might actually give me a heart attack.

I love you baby, with all my heart.

And I know……



I love you more. *wink*