Monday, August 24, 2009

Its Pouring

You know the saying when it rains it pours?

Well, today is one of those days.

Nothing seems to be going right.

First there was the frustration of transportation to JB.

Thought I solved it by driving down myself and looking forward to breaking fast with my baby, but change of plans, I cant go.

Then news from Italy broke, and it wasn’t positive.

Cant get the right size for the knee guard and her knee is in so much discomfort.

Then the issue of Jeremy giving me “the” letter.

Hey…. Its only 1pm.

Things are definitely looking downhill from here.

Keeping my fingers crossed that it will get better.


Sunday, August 23, 2009

An Inappropriate Question

An appropriate question.

Do you have any kids?

An inappropriate question……


Family planning?

You don’t like kids?

Are you trying?


Why must the majority of society likes to ask that?

Its personal and its none of your business.

You don’t have to push your values and your perspective of family down my throat.

So this is some of the responses you will get when you again ask those inappropriate questions.

1. Its hard to have a kid when I keep unloading down her mouth.

2. I have seen your kids, its not encouraging.

3. I can make kids? Do give me the details!

4. What is your take on anal sex?

5. I’m afraid I might be a paedophile and I am not into incest.

6. Its hard to practice kamasutra if she is pregnant.

7. I enjoy eating her so much I am done before the main event.

8. I stop trying when the neighbours lodge a complaint that we were keeping them awake all night.

9. I cant afford to buy new beds anymore after breaking my last 3 in a month.

10. Want to come watch and see what am I doing wrong?


Friday, August 21, 2009

Thank You

The Holy month is upon us again.

A time to remember where we came from and to give thanks for all that were received.

There is so many things that I would give thanks to….

My career.

My health.

But most of all……

I believe the song best explains it all.


Girl it's been a long, long time comin', yes it has
But I, I know that it's been worth the wait
It feels like springtime in winter
It feels like Christmas in June
It feels like heaven has opened up it's gates for me and you

Every time I close my eyes
I thank the lord that I've got you
And you've got me too
And every time I think of it
I pinch myself cuz I don't believe it's true
That someone like you loves me too

Girl I think that you're truly somethin', yes you are
And you're, you're every bit of a dream come true, yes you are
With you baby, it never rains
And it's no wonder
The sun always shines when I'm near you
It's just blessing that I have found somebody like you

To think of all the nights I've cried myself to sleep
You really oughta know how much you mean to me
It's only right, it's only right
(In my life) that you be in my life right here with me
Oh baby, baby, yeah


Saturday, August 15, 2009

Remember The Forgotten

The photo above is the Pulitzer Prize winning photo taken in 1994 during the Sudan famine. The picture depicts a famine-stricken child crawling towards a United Nations food camp, located a kilometer away.

The vulture is waiting for the child to die so it can eat it. This picture shocked the whole world. No one knows what happened to the child, including the photographer, Kevin Carter, who left the place as soon as the photograph was taken.

Three months later, he committed suicide due to depression.


I'm Gonna Make A Change,
For Once In My Life
It's Gonna Feel Real Good,
Gonna Make A Difference
Gonna Make It Right . . .

As I, Turn Up The Collar On My
Favourite Winter Coat
This Wind Is Blowin' My Mind
I See The Kids In The Street,
With Not Enough To Eat
Who Am I, To Be Blind?
Pretending Not To See Their Needs

A Summer's Disregard,
A Broken Bottle Top
And A One Man's Soul
They Follow Each Other On
The Wind Ya' Know
'Cause They Got Nowhere To Go
That's Why I Want You To Know

I'm Starting With The Man In The Mirror
I'm Asking Him To Change His Ways
And No Message Could Have Been Any Clearer
If You Wanna Make The World A Better Place
Take A Look At Yourself,
And Then Make A Change

I've Been A Victim Of A Selfish Kind Of Love
It's Time That I Realize
That There Are Some With No
Home, Not A Nickel To Loan
Could It Be Really Me,
Pretending That They're Not Alone?

A Willow Deeply Scarred,
Somebody's Broken Heart
And A Washed-Out Dream
They Follow The Pattern Of
The Wind, Ya' See
Cause They Got No Place To Be
That's Why I'm Starting With Me

I'm Starting With The Man In The Mirror
I'm Asking Him To Change His Ways
And No Message Could Have Been Any Clearer
If You Wanna Make The World A Better Place
Take A Look At Yourself,
And Then Make A Change


I Cry When I Have No Shoes, Until I Saw A Man With No Feet

Friday, August 14, 2009

Live Your Own Life


Its so amusing.

I had a few feedbacks about my previous blog.

I was told to remember the saying “Don’t fight with pigs….”

Let him live his life.

Leave him alone.

That was my intention.

I have already cut him out of my life.

It saddens me that I had to do what I did, but I did it coz he needed to learn from his mistakes.

It seems he didn’t learn at all.

He still haven’t found himself.

He is living another’s person’s life.

If he is grateful for what my sis and her hubby did, I can still bear with it.

But he embarrassed them, makes them feel bad, does not show respect….

He feels that the kids are part of his.

He feels that he is part of the family.

He is imposing himself on them.

And he thinks he is doing something right.

That’s the saddest part of all.

He doesn’t even know what he did wrong.

He thinks he is doing them a favour.


Get your own family.

That’s living your own life.

You do have your own family

Go impose yourself on your own sister.

Better still, get yourself a girl.

Stop hanging around a married woman.

Stop saying and doing things that makes her feel uncomfortable.

Stop telling the whole world what you did with her.

You are a friend, act like a friend, don’t be a pest.

But its too late for that now.

You have crossed the line too many times.

The line is a dot to you now.


My advice to you is still the same.

Find yourself.

Know who you are.

You cant do that by living in a cocoon thinking everything you do is right.

You cant do that by leeching off other people’s life.


It is time for reflection.

Thursday, August 13, 2009

Its Complete!

Yes, its official.

I have finally added the final piece to the puzzle.

I have now travelled to all the states in Malaysia.

Perlis, Kedah, Penang, Perak, Selangor, Negeri Sembilan, Melaka, Johor, Pahang, Terengganu, Kelantan, Sabah and at last…. Sarawak.

Some might say that its nothing to shout about but you will be surprised how many Malaysians have not done it.

At least I have…. So boo hoo to you, sour grapes.

Anyways, Kuching is as hot as KK.

Was on a very tight schedule, didn’t have the opportunity to try their local delicacies.

Will definitely go back to explore.


Wednesday, August 12, 2009


I woke up to my alarm at 6am.

Yeah… its early.

I have a flight to catch and wanted to find a great parking spot.

Still sleepy, so I pressed the snooze button.

God bless the snooze inventor.

Then I turn over and noticed…… no one there.

Was wondering why is she up so early?

Noticed that the bathroom light is off.

The living room lights are not on.

Could she be online in the dark?

Then I remembered….. she is some where else.

Damn…. I miss her.

Monday, August 10, 2009


This I promise you.

You are now on 2 weeks notice with me.

In this 2 weeks, you are on thin ice with me.

You are a brother to me once until you screwed up.

I don’t mind a screw up because that is what you are but I cut you off because you have shown me no remorse or regret for biting the hand that fed you.

I do not tolerate anyone who has no loyalty.

Now, you are creating problems to my sister.

You show no respect to her or her husband.

You leech off them.

You piss them off, but they are too nice to tell you off.

I feel responsible because I introduced you to them.

I feel responsible because I care about them.

After two weeks, all bets are off.

I have done it before and I will do it again.

I am not proud of what I have done but I will do it again if need be.

I will make your life a living hell.

I will make you wish you have never known me.

I will make you wish that you are never born.

This is not a threat, this is a promise.

In two weeks, if I find that you are still being a pest to them……

God have mercy on my soul for what I will do, cause there will be no mercy on yours!

Friday, August 7, 2009

Walk The Talk

It is not my intention to bring up an old issue.

I like the saying let sleeping dogs lie, but I need to reiterate something.

You keep saying I cannot handle it.

You like to imply that I cannot handle it.

Maybe its true, but we will never know.

But I know what am I handling badly.

Standing at the platform, not knowing am I jumping off.

I am reacting badly to the fact that I keep coming back to the platform and not knowing am I jumping off.

You told me once that I don’t need to stand at the edge until you know if you want me to jump.

But you keep sending me there and I keep standing at the edge.

And when I get chest pains, you say I cant handle the jump.

Its not the jump dear, it’s the anticipation of the jump, and the worse pains are when I have no idea am I going to jump.

You jump, I jump.

You say the jump is the same for the both of us.

I shouldn’t be so anal about it.

My dear, dear baby……

Its not the same, and it will never be the same.

You too have pains before , during and after the jump, but you enjoyed the jump.

You love the anticipation of the jump.

You love being involved in the jump.

You love talking about the jumps.

My dearest sayang…….

I only get chest pains…… there is no pleasure in it for me.

So, please excuse me if I am being anal about it.

You jump, I jump, because I love you.

I love seeing that smile on your face.

The smile that lights up your face like a beacon in the night.

Now you have said that I don’t have to jump at all, and I will not have to stand at the platform at all.

I hope you meant what you said.

I do love you, but another trip to the platform might actually give me a heart attack.

I love you baby, with all my heart.

And I know……

I love you more. *wink*

Monday, August 3, 2009

The Aftermath

I’m so glad it’s a new month.

July wasn’t a good month for me.

Last week was the worst.

The funeral.

The family politics.

A funeral brings family member closer, but I have seen funerals tearing a family apart.

Feuds, fights, jostling for position.

Luckily father’s funeral was not that bad.

There were moments where I had to hold my tongue out of respect for both my mother and father.

Yes, I do respect father.

Not the conventional way, but I grieve and cope in my own way.

Anyways, the deceased are gone but the living is left behind to grief.

It’s a major blow for mother as within two years, she has lost both her mum and her husband.

My grandma that I really adore and my father.

She now bears the burden of holding the family together.

She bears the responsibility of being fair.

She holds the power to give or take away.

I feel sorry for her.

I don’t wanna be in her shoes.

Anyways, I am glad I had a heart to heart chat with her.

She knows where I stand.

She knows I am there for her.

I just hope she isn’t pressured into making a decision on the family financial situation.

I love my mother in my own way.

She knows, I know, and that is all that matters.