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Thursday, June 26, 2008

Roll Call

Linda, Dayana, Alena, Muzidah, American Chick, Zuridah, Stephanie, Joyce, Shikin, Nadiah, Nicole, Yana, Zurina, Madeline, Pahang Gal, Sue, Dewi, Mie, Fizah, Siti, Bee, Lyana, Moon, Nurul, Beth

Go figure..... *wink*

You wanna get married?

Just had lunch with one of my trainee.

We were just shooting the breeze when the topic of marriage came up.

He wants to marry his gal.

Just a bit of background on my trainee. He is in his mid 20s and his galfriend is in her early 20s.

My trainee is working as an agent in a call center while his gal is still studying.

Financially they are not stable, but what got me thinking is that the dude is still playing the field.

Out of curiosity, I ask him why does he want to get married.

He said they have been dating for 6 years.

I told him that’s not a good reason.

He feels obligated to marry her because she helped him when times were bad.

Obligated? That’s a horrendous reason to get married.

The galfriend will “mengungkit” if he doesn’t marry her!

WoW! Now that’s a good reason….. hahahahaha

Its nice of him to do what he thinks is right…. but marriage is not for a day or two. Its suppose to be forever.

Love is the predominant factor for two people wanting to be together forever.

Without love….. the chances are high that the marriage wont work.

Unfortunately, love is not enough to make a marriage work.

There is respect, understanding, tolerance and whole lots more.

Its one thing to say that you miss your partner when apart, but its totally different when you have to be with that person 24/7.

Love can turn to hate when there is no other factors involved.

You think about that person all the time. You have strong feelings for that person. You dream about that person. There is a lot of things you wanna say and do to that person.

Did I describe love? Or hate?

It can be either one.

Hate is just a flipside away from love.

So….. please have a good reason to get married.

No need to think a million times or think things over a week.

Just have a good reason… then you can get married.

Wednesday, June 25, 2008

Good bye......

Came home from work last night and there it was, laying on its side

Normally they would float….. but it just lay on its side…..

I was in shock.

Yana was crying.

I wanted to cry, but I kept telling myself, its only a fish.

I used to flush my previous fishes down the toilet, but it was too big.

It had grown to nearly a feet long.

When I picked it up from the tank, it was heavy.

Reminded me of all the feeding frenzy and the way its tummy looks like it ate a golf ball.

Mummy was sad too and joked that I should have sold it to her.

It was beautiful. Physically beautiful.

Rustic colored fins with a dark body.

A broad white line on its side making it look sporty.

The way it feed. Sucking prawns into its mouth.

Hunting other smaller fishes.

Will be missed…..

*sob*

Monday, June 2, 2008

From The Bottom Of My Heart

We are the complete opposites.

We come from different cultural backgrounds.

I trust easily and you are distrusting all the time.

I am optimistic and you are cynical.

I prefer to stay at home but you want to socialize.

I see the good in all and you see the bad.

I love to protect and you hate people think you need protection.

But you are my everything.

You are my best friend when we are hanging out.

You are my “dude” when I am hunting.

You are my “enemy” when I need a good debate.

You are my shoulder when I need to cry.

You are my lover when I am horny.

You are my advisor when I am lost.

You are my rock when I am astray.

You are my confidante when I need to express myself.

You are crazy when I need to be crazy.

You are serious when I need to be serious.

You are always there when I need you.

You are my soul mate.

I love you…….

Soul Mates

Have I always believed in soul mates?

I don’t know.

Though its hard for me to admit, I guess I have always been a romantic at heart. Probably, due to the lack of affection shown in my developing years.

I was always buried in books, lapping up the scenarios and atmospheres conjured by the authors of wonderfully written books.

I probably believed in soul mates when I was younger…. until the harsh brutality of the real world keeps beating down on me.

After many unsuccessfully romances, I kinda stop believing in soul mates.

I became a jerk (hehehe… I am still a jerk), a no nonsense efficient in your face hunter. I stop indulging in small talks, romance, dating…..

Then I got married. Not that I was settling.

She was beautiful.

She was desired by others.

She chose me…. I was flattered.

She gave me two beautiful angels.

How can I fault her.

It takes two to make a marriage work.

I have my faults. She has hers.

I kinda stop loving her.

Tried to make it work for the sake of my angels but the shoutings and the fights were taking a toll on them too.

I had to leave….. the hardest decision I ever had to make.

Do I still believe in soul mates…? Probably not at that time.

I would never have believed that I could be one of the lucky ones, the blessed few who can actually find their soul mates and be with them.

How many times have I heard of someone finding their soul mates but cannot be together?

What are the chances that you will find your soul mate and she finds that you are also her soul mate?

I guess I would rather take my chances on a lottery ticket.

I did win….. but not financially……

I found my soul mate, she found her soul mate. We found each other.

Two peas in a pod.

Birds of a feather.

Do I believe in soul mates?

Definitely, absolutely, positively YES!

Happy Birthday

The month of June has always been hard on me.

This is the month my two princesses were born.

June, 17 1996. Nadya Syaqeera was brought forth to the world. I missed the wonderful occasion because I was stuck in Kuantan. That’s probably why I over-compensate by spoiling her.

June, 28 1998. Sofea Jazmeen. I stood there transfixed when the doctor pulled her into our world. It’s an experience I will never forget. I am sorry for all those times when u feel I love your sister more than you. That’s not true. I love you more than you can ever imagine.

It’s hard because I believe that birthdays should be celebrated with the ones that loves u.

It’s hard because I love the both of you with all my heart.

It’s hard because I am not there for you when you need me.

Happy Birthday my darlings!

Happy Birthday my beautiful angels!

Happy Birthday......